Tired of people bugging you at holiday times? Why waste time worrying about whether you will get the Valentine’s Day cards and stuff you expect when I will guarantee that you won’t have to worry about me remembering you?

Make your payment and you can rest assured that I will not send you anything on Wednesday, February 14, 2007! That’s right. I will leave you alone. I will even send you a worthless piece of paper that says I promise to ignore you on Wednesday, February 14, 2007. Heck, I will probably forget all about you once you I send your worthless piece of paper to you.

Nothing lasts forever and nothing is the best gift you could possibly buy. Show someone you really care by giving them nothing with a certificate to prove it. This is the last of batch offered during May 2006-this is the last of nothing. You actually receive a numbered, signed, stamped Certificate of Authenticity SEE PICTURES. Get nothing before it is gone.

Jer Says:
Alas! The perfect gift. This is what I am getting everybody this year.

I bought a bag of jelly beans for our family, and made everyone Easter baskets. These were brand name beans, and they tasted really good. But I happened to reach in one of the baskets, and found this one.

It’s pretty ironic how the yellow section is elongated into that unmistakeable form. But the fact that there are two other jelly beans of the same color on opposite ends in the right place, well, there is something unusual about this.

T’was the night before Christmas and all through the house,
not a creature was stirring, not even my mouse.
The stockings were hung by the cuff not the sole,
in hopes that this year we’d get more than just coal.
The children have grown and all moved away,
they do come to visit, but never to stay.
I climbed into bed all tired and sore,
Hubby asleep and starting to snore.

This button has had some pretty amazing adventures

My kid is a big Pittsburgh Steelers fan and his favorite Steeler is Troy Polamalu. I handcrafted this ornament as a gift for him because, as we all know, handcrafted gifts are SO much better than those that are mass produced in China. Ask Martha Stewart. It was the best ornament on the Christmas tree. I thought it was the best gift EVER.

My kid then received a mass-produced-in-China #43 Polamalu Jersey from his grandfather and declared IT to be the best gift EVER. Whatever Martha.

One morning I looked out my window and saw some tracks in the snow. Could they be? Could they really be the tracks of the exotic Silver Sequined Christmas Easter Santa Bunny?

I went outside and took a closer look.

Yes! They were the fresh tracks of the elusive Santa Bunny. Out of the corner of my eye I saw some movement in the bushes and caught a flash of silver sequins and bright red fur.