I have up for auction all rights to ownership of any future grilled cheese sandwiches, pancakes, French fries, ceiling water stains, rocks, roadside litter, etc. that I may find that bare an image in likeness to the Virgin Mary, Jesus, and any other notable biblical figure!

This is a once in a lifetime opportunity! We have all seen the news stories where these miraculous images show up in unexpected places only to make unbelievable profits for the seller on eBay! Bid now and double your chances of this happening for you!

Jer Says:
Why spend $100 for Jesus on a slice of bread, $75 for Moses on a Cheeto, or $200 for the image of Virgin Mary in a catbox, when, for one low price, you could possibly get all three? This is one sweet deal.

The story goes that I was busy working on my car during the night when some boots that I hadn’t worn in years caught my eye in the corner of my shop. A figure appeared in the shoes that looked a lot like Jesus (it may have been a homeless man though). He had long hair and a short brown beard. When I saw the figure, I thought that I might have been inhaling a bit too many fumes so I decided to get some air.

Five of the most respected sellers of haunted metaphysical items on ebay have each donated one of her most Powerful Jinn Vessels, which when put together creates an ENERGY of UNIMAGINABLE MAGNITUDE!

The pieces seem to literally feed off the energy of one another, adding to and multiplying the already astounding aura each gives off. Please get comfortable, and take the time to read the entire listing, as each seller who has donated a piece has shared her item’s description, as well as some experiences emailed from her buyers.

I can’t take the FEAR anymore so I am forced to sell this very rare EXTREMELY HAUNTED KLEENEX!!!

The Patented “Spook Proof” chamber will keep you safe at night when you sleep, but I can’t promise you will be able to sleep. This thing is scary as hell. Don’t say I didn’t warn you! ABSOLUTELY NO RETURNS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If you really do believe it’s haunted you might actually be afraid of a Kleenex

View scary haunted Kleenex auction

The item within the jar is parchment paper from 1815… In order to find out what is inscribed on the paper, and why my life is a train wreck, you WILL have to keep watching til the end… If you Do not BELIEVE it is CURSED…Be the idiot that bids and wins this CURSED JAR…

Is it better to remain silent and be thought an idiot or bid and prove it?

View cursed jar auction

Hang this object in your home facing the front door and the rare earth metal alloy in the frame will keep the devil out of your home just as Kryptonite would repel Superman. In the unlikely event of a home penetration by Satan, break the glass, put the unicorn hair bracelet on your right wrist, place your hand on your heart and recite the pledge of allegiance to the flag. The devil will whimper like a sick puppy and vanish.